How about an Adoption Story :)

Finally!!!! I can post our recent adoption story! Who doesn't love reading these?! Well most of you know we had a heck of a journey to Joseph! It all began after finalizing on Daniel in July 08. We applied to Gladney & entered the Ethiopia program for an infant girl, little did we know that God had his plans for a local baby boy! As we began all the paper work for the International process, Dallas began getting cold feet & really wanted to experience a newborn if possible. So we decided on a domestic adoption process instead. Long story short we were contacted about a possible private adoption on a boy that didn't pan out & that prolonged our approval process for Gladney. Well in Jan 09, we moved on with the ABC program with Gladney. Finsihed all the paper work, homestudy, & medical exams in March. We were waiting for our Approval letter & were matched in April with a birthmom. It was a boy as previously stated in this blog. Long story short she decided to parent. Two months passed & we recieved the call again we were chosen in July. Ofcourse this was the most devastating loss yet. We truly felt we lost a baby in our hearts, much like a death. That baby boy we named Andrew will always always be in our hearts. I truly believe he needed us to get to where he is now. God had a plan for him, and us all along. Just one week later our case worker called again. Yikes!!!!! We weren't ready for this! Terrified to be matched again, we accepted the match. She was 32 weeks along, and man I was nervous! I had to wait until September to see if all was going to work out! As time passed our relationship grew with the birth family. Especially us Mom's. One birthmother & one Adoptive mother bonding. Everytime I would talk to her, I felt better & better about the match. A peace was coming over me & she felt the same way. When we finally met, we took the birth parents to Joe's Crab Shack! How ironic, I still need to go get an onesie from there for Joseph for a keepsake of where we met his birth parents for the 1st time! They are an awesome couple! It just felt right! We met while she was 36 weeks along & she was soooo ready to deliver at this point. We were happy he was still cooking, b/c she had been hospitalized twice at 32/33wks with preterm labor. They gave her a steriod injection for his lungs to mature just in case. So when we were leaving the restaurant she told me she was ready now that she had met us in person to deliver! I was sooo excited, but wanted him to cook just a little while longer :) Well she made it to 39 weeks & 1 day!! The day we got the call, Dallas heard the "Baby Momma" phone ring!! He began yelling "Ali, Ali, Ali It's ringing!" LOL! Ofcourse the stupid little phone had no air time on it. So I began calling her from another phone! Our birthfather answered & said "He's here" I began jumping up & down crying!" Our Birthmother was calling us from the hospital & couldn't reach us! We missed the birth, but that's ok! I was just excited he was here!!! It was sooo surreal getting the call from the birth parents rather than our case worker! We high tailed it to the hospital & brought her flowers! She looked good & in high spirits when we walked in the room. Joseph's birthfather was holding him & they looked so cute! I went over & gave our birthmother a hug & before I knew it Joseph was handed to me!!! Tears began to flow & our birthmother said don't cry! He was soooo beautiful & it felt soooo good for her to call me Mommy right off the bat! Her approval meant the world to me! She asked right off to spend the night with her! I said "Ofcourse!" She said "Don't cry" lol! So we spent some time together with all 5 of us, then Dallas & I left so I could go home & pack my bag & Joseph's bag! She said hurry back! While I was at home packing she called & wanted to know how much longer I would be! She wanted me up there sooo bad! I stopped & got her Whataburger on the way! Once I got back she said he missed you :) I just love her! The bonding began at once. Oh, I forgot before we left the hospital to go pack the nurse came in & gave me a bracelet that gave me all access to go pick him up from the nursery! It was surreal!!!! From then on I never left the hospital until the morning of placement to go shower & come back with Dallas in one car. I did shower at the hospital, so I wasn't stinky, lol! It was the best 48 hrs, but also intense. I hated seeing her in pain as the cramps would come & go. I never left her side & she gave me all the bonding with Joseph from day one! She said she would wake in the middle of the night & look over & see us sleeping together. Mommy & baby, it gave her such peace she said. She told me it's like he know's you're his Mommy. She told me if hadn't been for us, she wouldn't have been able to go through with it. It was so surreal to have this experience. I can tell you the coolest moment ever was...the nurse came in the morning of discharge, the day of his circumcision, she had some patients to check in on before bringing Joseph to our room, but he was ready to come out of the nursery. So I went to go get him, it was the coolest feeling walking the halls in my pj's with my baby in his bassinet! People oohing & Awwing over him & he was my son! I got back to the room & got dressed to go home. I told her to take this time while I was gone to say Goodbye. She didn't want me to leave. and I sensed she was scared to be alone with him. I told her to tell him, how much she loved him. I hugged her & told her I would see her soon. Well I walked out of the room, but forgot my parking ticket to go get validated. When I walked back in the room, she was holding him looking at his sweet face with tears rolling down her face. I hugged her bye again & said it would be ok. I finally got to my car, and for the first time I was alone in that 48 hrs & it hit me like a ton of bricks! Her sadness, & everything we just experienced together. The tears just began to flow like Niagra Falls! I only had 2 hrs to get home, get cleaned up before we had to be up there to meet our case worker to sign our Placement Papers. I was so tired, sad, & slightly excited. But mostly sad for her. Before I knew it, we were back at the hospital signing. I asked my case worker how she was doing, she said they are signing now. Emotional, but signing their relinquishments. At that time it hit me, it's really happening! When we were all done with paper work we met back in the hospital room. There she sat bawling her eyes out & I lost it!!! I ran over there & we just held on to each other crying together over sweet Joseph. I told her how much I loved her & how much Joseph will always love her & know about them. He will always know his story & what we went through together. We snapped some pictures & I got some really good ones of them telling him goodbye. Before I knew it we were walking the hallway together to the nursery for Joseph's discharge. When we got there, they asked for the Adoptive mother to come in for discharge paper work. I though that was a little insensitive & this hurt her feelings & she began sobbing. Which I began sobbing, paper work was a little messed up & they did end up needing her wrist bands. I gave her his pacifer, hospital blankets, & bear. I told her how sorry I was for their insensitivity, and that she is important to us. By this time we had an AUDIENCE as we are in public view in the viewing window in the nursery, Everyone picked up on our grief & her saying goodbye one last time. His birthfather came in & told him one last goodbye also. I told him to please take care of her. Hugged them both wiped her tears & gave her a kiss on her cheek. Then she was gone & I was standing in the nursery all alone with the nurses apologizing for the mix up. Apparently they didn't get her bracelets at her discharge time & they weren't sure if they needed anything else from her, so she had to stand & wait longer in her agony. It was devastating & sucked b/c our private moment turned south in front of strangers experiencing our grief. I know everyone that saw us bawling & me consoling her will never forget that moment. When she left the Pediatrician came by & examined him one last time. The nurses went over everything & packed me up with a diaper bag full of formula & pacifers. I was taking my baby home. The happiest day of my life was her saddest. That just was an awful feeling, but part of the process. It wasn't until we got home that I could experience the happiness. I gave her a call to let her know we made it home & she was doing better. She gave me the ok, to begin being a family. So we did... I will never ever forget her sacrifice as a mother. She gave me the gift I could never have, her son & hospital experience. I will love her always & so will Joseph. As it isn't Good bye, but see you soon ;)